How food and body image impact relationship health with Elizabeth Earnshaw
In the latest episode of our podcast, we had an engaging conversation with Elizabeth Earnshaw, popularly known as Liz Listens on Instagram. She joined us to discuss her new book, "Till Stress Do Us Part," and shed light on various aspects of stress in relationships. Whether you're in a committed partnership or navigating personal challenges, this dialogue offers valuable insights.
The Underlying Dynamics of Stress
Elizabeth began by explaining how stress can emerge from both external and internal factors in relationships. External stressors might include work-related issues or family obligations, while internal stressors often stem from unresolved conflicts or communication barriers within the partnership itself. Elizabeth emphasized the importance of recognizing these stressors and understanding their impact on relationships.
Mental Load and Its Impact
A significant portion of the conversation centered around the concept of mental load—an often invisible stressor affecting many relationships today. Elizabeth pointed out how this burden frequently falls unevenly in partnerships, leading to resentment and conflict. She urged couples to address the mental load by redistributing tasks in a way that feels fair rather than strictly equal.
Flooding and Emotional Overwhelm
Elizabeth introduced us to the term "flooding," describing how physiological responses to stress can influence communication and conflict resolution. When overwhelmed, individuals might become less empathetic and more self-focused. Recognizing these signs allows partners to take a step back and address issues with a calmer mindset.
The Role of Thirds in Relationships
An intriguing concept Elizabeth presented is that of "thirds" in a relationship—external elements that consume resources like time, energy, or attention, potentially causing tension. Whether it's a hobby, a family member, or even an eating disorder, identifying these thirds can help couples refocus on maintaining a healthy partnership by setting appropriate boundaries.
Body Image as a Stressor
We delved into how body image issues can become a third in relationships. From postpartum changes to eating disorders, Elizabeth explained how partners can support each other by externalizing the problem, discussing boundaries and empathy. She stressed the importance of recognizing each other's perspectives and working together to alleviate the stressor's impact.
The Path to Co-Regulation
Co-regulation is vital in managing stress within relationships. Elizabeth highlighted the importance of staying calm during disagreements, recognizing bodily cues of stress, and consciously choosing to regulate emotions. By doing so, partners can create a sense of safety and calm, fostering a supportive environment.
Building Boundaries for Better Relationships
Elizabeth emphasized the need for clear boundaries to protect relationships from stressors. This includes respecting each other’s approach to dealing with personal issues and acknowledging how these issues affect the partnership. Open communication and mutual understanding are key to establishing effective boundaries.
Conclusion
Elizabeth Earnshaw's insights from "Till Stress Do Us Part" offer couples practical tools to navigate the complexities of stress in modern relationships. By identifying stressors, practicing empathy, and setting boundaries, partners can work towards a healthier, more balanced dynamic. Connect with Elizabeth on Instagram @LizListens, visit her website at ElizabethEarnshaw.com, or explore her regional practice at A Better Life Therapy in Philadelphia for further guidance.
As always, we hope our discussion provides helpful takeaways for your life and relationships. Thank you for joining us on this episode, and we look forward to continuing these enriching conversations.
